itchicalypse

Itchicalypse

                16.10.2018

Buying pre owned goods is fun exclaimed  everteen. And at a bargain too reciprocated Jollykid, wide eyed. I couldn’t but chuckle! as I recollected  reading somewhere “ never sell to clowns, never buy from  Jokers”

We all understand sales through Ads on Social media platforms can be painstaking and intimidating and can sometimes lead to crazy or piquant situations.

Kuchesht R Soudagar is the archetypal oniomaniac (one suffering from cbd).His condition has progressed to such an extent, that at every given opportunity he goes on a ‘Surfing’ spree. Of late he has even cultivated the art of persuasion. So, let’s take a break from the tensions of everyday life, join him on one of his epic adventures and enjoy a hearty laugh.

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Posted at: 2018-08-29 14:27:13 | 1687 comments | Add Comment

Original ad:

Laptop for Sale - HP 15 Core I5 8^th Gen. In mint Condition Rs.38000/ . Only Email me at Atulsellbhikri*******@gmail.com. Hagglers not entertained.

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From Kuchesht R Soudagar ******* @ gmail.com.           
  to  Atulsellbhikri*****@gmail.com.

Hello Atul,

That's a really nice  Camera you have in the picture. What’s the asking price?

Kuchesht

From Atulsellbhikri*******@gmail.com .                                                                                                  to Kuchesht R Soudagar ******* @ gmail.com 

Sorry . Only selling the Laptop.

Kuchesht R Soudagar ******* @ gmail.com.                                                                                      to  Atulsellbhikri*****@gmail.com

I'll give you Rs.30000/- for the Camera.

From Atulsellbhikri*******@gmail.com .                                                                                                    to Kuchesht R Soudagar ******* @ gmail.com 

Read the ad . The Laptop and not camera  is  for sale.

Kuchesht R Soudagar ******* @ gmail.com.                                                                                    to  Atulsellbhikri*****@gmail.com

You are making it difficult to negotiate on the camera. I'll give you Rs.35000/- for it, and that is my final offer.Sure you will find it most suitable..

From Atulsellbhikri*******@gmail.com .                                                                                                  to Kuchesht R Soudagar ******* @ gmail.com

And this is is my FINAL offer: shut the hell up and leave me alone!

 Kuchesht R Soudagar from a newly created email account & assumed name…..

    

Vignasagar  ******* @ gmail.com.                                                                                                     to  Atulsellbhikri*****@gmail.com

Hi, I'm mailing you about the Camera. Your asking price of Rs.40000/- sounds a bit higher .       Maybe  With  Data card,Battery Charger and Chord ? . I'll take it!

Vignasagar

From Atulsellbhikri*******@gmail.com .                                                                                                 to Vignasagar  ******* @ gmail.com

 The Camera  is not for sale.Stop daydreaming.

Vignasagar  ******* @ gmail.com.                                                                                                      to  Atulsellbhikri*****@gmail.com

Pardon me? But, that's not mentioned in your ad . Shifting stance? Aren’t You?

From Atulsellbhikri*******@gmail.com .                                                                                                  to Vignasagar  ******* @ gmail.com  

I have said  nothing about the Camera in my ad. I'm selling only the Laptop, not the camera. Look again. I have not mentioned  Camera in my ad..

Vignasagar  ******* @ gmail.com.                                                                                                      to  Atulsellbhikri*****@gmail.com

Don’t try to trick  me around. This ad clearly says you are selling the Camera!

I can assure you I am not  minority so you can stop acting modest.  Selling, the camera aren’t  you?        

From Atulsellbhikri*******@gmail.com .                                                                                                  to Vignasagar  ******* @ gmail.com.

Oh my God...swear I didn’t put that ad. Somebody is tampering with my ad

Please send me the link to that ad so I can have them tracked down?

Vignasagar ******* @ gmail.com.                                                                                                       to  Atulsellbhikri*****@gmail.com

Sorry, I cannot. Others too use this computer  so I had to delete my  history because I was looking at…Hmm. …err  classified  information earlier. It was somewhere in the “QuickSel” Profile.  If I'm not mistaken...does this mean I can't buy your Camera ?

Kuchesht R Soudagar from yet another new email account & another assumed name……

Rafiul Saudagar Warsi ******* @ gmail.com.                                                                                    to  Atulsellbhikri*****@gmail.com

Dear casteist beef waffle,

I have a serious problem  with you. I chanced upon your ad while searching  for a Camera  and this  seemed like an attractive deal. But,your comment about not selling to minority was revolting. Shame on you, connecting faith with  selling a Camera! This is outrageous. Maan,  you are  sick……….. dreadful.

 NOT interested in buying your Camera  of abhorrence.

Rafiul Saudagar Warsi

From Atulsellbhikri*******@gmail.com .                                                                                                 to Rafiul Saudagar Warsi  ******* @ gmail.com.                                                                          

Presumption ! Have no problem with minority at all! Suspect someone put that ad up to hound me and I can’t find where it is! Can you provide the link to the ad please??

Rafiul Saudagar Warsi  ******* @ gmail.com.                                                                                   to  Atulsellbhikri*****@gmail.com

.

Why don't you spew your Hate on  someone else?  I’m fed up with your dirty antics.                    Don’t want to buy !

Atulsellbhikri finally decided to email Kuchesht R Soudagar on his original account:

From Atulsellbhikri*******@gmail.com .                                                                                                  to Kuchesht R Soudagar ******* @ gmail.com 

Irritating busybody!  I know for sure you put that damn ad  and you better delete it NOW. I'm also sure you have a hand in all other messages . I’m not selling the  Camera. And stop behaving like      a moron. Quit. Quit now ,I Say.  

Kuchesht R Soudagar ******* @ gmail.com.                                                                                     to  Atulsellbhikri*****@gmail.com

I'm sorry, I thought it would help.My desire  was to do  you a favour. I wanted you to see                    a large number of extraordinary offers you could get if only  you decided to sell your Camera.

From Atulsellbhikri*******@gmail.com .                                                                                                  to Kuchesht R Soudagar ******* @ gmail.com   

 Gawd ! I'M NOT SELLING the  Camera .Darn it.  > Now Tell me you oaf,  why you published     that rubbish about Minority if you sincerely wanted to help?

Kuchesht R Soudagar ******* @ gmail.com.                                                                                     to  Atulsellbhikri*****@gmail.co

I detected some strong casteist sentiments in your initial correspondence so thought you were a hate monger & I apologize.

From Atulsellbhikri*******@gmail.com .                                                                                                  to Kuchesht R Soudagar ******* @ gmail.com 

D E L E  T E  the ad NOWWWWW.!!  You S ( $ * ^/ ? @>+_

Kuchesht R Soudagar emailed him one last time, from yet another newly             created account & and  a new alias

Harushakumara ******* @ gmail.com.                                                                                                   to  Atulsellbhikri*****@gmail.com

Good morning Sir!  Sure you are doing fine.

I saw your picture ad under “ Camera for sale”. I'm actually very interested in the Sun glasses        you have displayed . Aviator ? I'll take it for  Rs.600/-…….. c a s h .

- Harushakumara

From Atulsellbhikri*******@gmail.com .                                                                                                    to Harushakumara *****@gmail.com

No Laptop, no Camera, no Sunglasses. Threw them all away into that stinking Bellandur lake.          Go ,Scuba Dive  and get them for freeeeee. And No more mails ,you ruffian..

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Final Note: CBD: Compulsive Buying Disorder

Dumpsites

Dumpsites for the elderly

                                                        18.09.2017

Recently, I visited my friend of 50 years at a home for  aged people  where he has ’settled’. (Incarcerated?) Not having met for over 3 years,I expected to see the same old face: a perpetual smile , inquisitive, beady eyes and a wit a second banter.The setting looked pleasant, with green lawns ,neat and tidy rooms. I was told by the Administrator that it was lunch time and that my Friend would meet me in a few minutes. Sitting in the waiting room, myriad thoughts crossed my mind.

When  children  grow up ,go out into the outside world they  are caught up   in the quagmire of fiercely competitive struggle for security,status, wealth and luxury. With growing demands on their time, familial bonds are weakened and the aging parents are forced to reconcile to the situation.

It is the breakup of the system of the joint family and the emergence of a nuclear family that has brought this new concept , and the old age homes have come up to cater to the needs of the elderly.

The idea  of an old age home is new to India. An old age home is usually the place where the inmates get all the facilities required for a routine living on payment.

Separation of elders from children is a direct consequence of adopting the living style practiced in the west.

It may not be so heart-rending there, as it is their original life style  But, in India where, for centuries, not  two but three, four or even five  generations have lived together.The relatively  new concept of nuclear family is putting the older generations  in a lot of strain.

But can even the best old age homes  replicate the warmth and security of home? The affection, bonding & love between a child and parents can never be explained by science or the best of writers.

One by one,the inmates emerge from the dining Hall. The are very curious and crowd around me, enquiringly “Have you come to meet  V….”? Engaging me in a conversation,they are as excited as children in a candy store.Everyone gives an account of themself,their children, grandchildren and….. Home . Suddenly I hear a voice in the crowd  “Yaen Subramanya?” A gaunt,bald and aged apparition struggles forward. I cannot suppress a Gasp. Here is my Friend, totally unrecognizable. There is awkward silence. The other inmates politely leave. Though shocked,I manage to mumble a greeting. Gradually we try to recollect our younger days. But this is not the face I remember. The smile and twinkle  in the eye are gone,and no witty anecdotes. There is total detachment in his talk.  

I quickly gather that being an old person is not easy . Deep inside those moist eyes one sees that these people were suffering from “affection”

 Talking with these unfortunate people, listening to their fond memories, I learnt a lot about old age and its inevitable consequences. Every story was much the same:  turmoil in the family, disgust & impatience   with the aged and, finally  their displacement from the family. Though seemingly happy and contented,one can detect a pining. Many of them live under the perpetual illusion that someday their sons or daughters would come back and give them some space in the comfort of their  home.

The visit left a deep impact on my conscience. Suddenly,now I feel more sensitive towards the rat race called life.

Death is a certainty.It is entirely in the hands of children to see the transition is without tears , pain and agony.

As I was leaving, a lady  inmate who walked with me to the gates said ” Children are so busy growing up that they forget parents are growing old”

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shathamanam bhavathi  shathayuh  purushah shatendriya  Ayushyevendriyae  prathitishtathi

(ashirvada mantra from Taittiriya Braahmana)

Roughly translated,the  meaning of this blessing is:

The person uttering this sloka wishes the person who is being blessed with a life of         100 springs in one lifetime;  with fully functioning Indhriyams (senses) during that           lifetime; and to have all the faculties held fully intact,in order to discharge all the           daily chores demanded by life; and to pursue the virtuous way of life , be it in the       physical, mental, social or the spiritual domain.

Is the above mantra is still relevant ?,Can anyone whole heartedly offer this blessing                without a a tinge of guilt after going through the  traumatic experience  of visiting

a                   Home for the aged? Some people are convinced that old age is a curse and there may    be as hint of  arguable justification of the belief.