Paradox, Contradiction, Ambiguity … a measure of enlightenment

 

Paradox, Contradiction,  Ambiguity …

             a measure of enlightenment

 

Over the last few weeks I have been meeting old classmates and a few close Associates. Predictably discussions covered many areas , importantly one’s health and well-being.

      I have now understood that it is very difficult to get anyone  listen to your source of happiness . Even the closest of   friends turns to other topics tactfully. God seems to be the only one  willing to listen & savour  your happiness.

On the other hand   everyone listens attentively, with full eagerness to hear what is being said ,even if  you are sharing your sorrow in hushed tones with the person  sitting next to you.. And before you can say Huh! the group  transforms itself into a committee of good Samaritans & engages  in profound debate on steps that could be taken to.address the cause of your distress

Therefore, is it not logical  to believe  that one should share his delight & glory with the Almighty and distress with people ?

Unfortunately we do exactly the opposite  by Rushing to the nearest temple  &  pouring out our misery to all 33 crore Gods and  seeking out  even long lost friends and associates to share our .Jubilation

 

Odds & Ends

 

Odds & Ends

Waking up, I find its raining. As I am about to get up from bed, I check the time on my mobile by force of habit. It’s  2:00 am !. Lying down again  I Toss & turn in bed but I cannot  sleep.  I feel intense anger  and self – contempt

 Don’t know why

There are a few people who actually even  enjoy this state , the types  that  perpetually  grumble  . I like to believe I am not one of those .

Don’t know why

I am no idealist either. I like to believe I am attempting to be one, but that might seem  distinctly  dishonest.

Don’t know why

Sleep still eludes me .Suddenly for no reason I think  I like to live like a silk worm. Or am I one, already?.  I can even compensate for the missing cocoon  by raising  an imaginary hood  around myself ,into which I can withdraw more often  & into which none  dare enter .

Don’t know why

Monotonous  grind  sickens me. I feel no pleasure in the conventional. Is life just being trapped  in the groove and running round in circles over and over again ? Don’t recall when  I  got  stuck in this wheel of despair  and torment

Don’t know why/when

I detest people who have very impractical views of circumstances. I find it impossible to accept people who .glorify even the most ordinary  matters 

Don’t know why

Thoughts, doubts, questions   ! . As I try finding replies   I hear a faint bleat …. And then see the  sheep: 1, 2, 3 ……… before  finding the answers, Sleep came without definition, as did the dream.

 &  it should know why