Holy Rasam !
Leaf Me Alone
Most
of us would have been to a south Indian wedding, but for the people who
haven’t, or attending for the first time let me give you a glimpse of what it
feels like to be there , with some special guidance too.
The most important event at the wedding is not the ceremony where the
groom ties the knot. It’s the next immediate reaction - a minimum crowd of
around 250 people scampering to find a seat in the dining room. A fight with
strangers, catering staff or even members of the Host’s family trying to push strangers away, and
triumphantly taking your seat at a table
that looks like Christ’s last supper.
Welcome to the high stakes, maximum-gravity arena of the South Indian wedding
feast
[sadya-സദ്യ, Aritaku Bhojanam -అరిటాకు
భోజనం or ThalaiVazhaielai
virundhu தலைவாழை இலை விருந்து
].
A long
paper is rolled out on the steel tables
and a guy follows up folding it on the
sides preventing it from flying away and falling on the one sitting opposite to
us. That’s when you realize, there is a
similar long row of people sitting right opposite staring right into your eyes,
and shall witness what’s about to unfold. A large,
green, non-polluting, sustainable, healthy with antimicrobial properties
banana leaf is unfolded and placed right in front of you , waiting to
unleash its long list of healthy properties.
Though it does look like you’re dining
in the age of dinosaur and maybe the
leaf in itself looks edible, there’s more coming your way. There are 2 parts to the leaf, the top portion
houses all the poriyals, curries,
“sides”, appetizers. The bottom part of your leaf is reserved exclusively
for the mountains of rice that you can
consume and for another purpose which we shall discover as we pig out
When you
take a peep to the left ,at the distant end of the tables, a group of people are lined
up and on cue start heading our way, like a military parade but with vessels,Trays & buckets of delicious
food in their hands.
To
start with, a sweet is placed on the bottom
right end corner of your leaf. We always start with something sweet for
a celebratory occasion. Then they place a cutlet or an appetizer like paneer
tikka or a vegetable spring roll, which,though alien for the “South” leaf itself and “our” people, you accept with a pinch of inclusivity. Then a
variety of vegetable curries made of potatoes, beans lentils or other
vegetables follows, that are placed one
beside the other, ending the row with an avial — a mix of 13 vegetables, ground coconut &
curry leaves and with a single spoon of pickle and salt in the end
Then
comes a person with a large stainless steel basin and an extra-large curved
paddle, to push a humongous quantity of rice and he expects you to create a crater
in the middle. Before you wonder why, 350ml of steaming hot sambhar gets poured in
the middle with a lot of vegetables floating as they were. You only get 12 seconds
to mix the rice and sambhar to prevent it sliding down the leaf So continue to look for a “side”, the spicy potato
curry placed exactly 30 degrees north of your
sambhar.You also get served a white, crispy Appalam fried in oil which you may
consume in numbers , until the server gets a little Apprehensive about your oil intake.
The “rice
guy” as he is named is appearing before you at the sight of your empty banana leaf. He
just waits for your nod to fill the space again with another mountain of rice and
ensures you create the same crater again. Now you can opt for a
variety of gravy like vatha kulambu, mor kulambu or just rasam which helps in
digestion of all life sustaining Sludge that fill your tummy. If you choose rasam,
which is a spicy watery tamarind and tomato soup, your skill to not let it
overflow and drip down on yourselves or the persons sitting on either side to you
will be put to its ultimate test .
Suddenly, a server arrives and splashes a golden, piping-hot river of rasam
directly into your crater.. It is highly
volatile, structurally liquid, and actively looking for an exit toward your
lap.Do not panic. Gently sweep the outer walls of the rice volcano into the
centre pool, creating a thick, manageable slurry. Scoop the mixture and move it
toward your mouth immediately. Speed is your ally; surface tension is your enemy.
Tilt your upper body forward at a precise 38 1/2 -degree angle over the leaf. If a drop falls, it
must fall back onto the leaf, not your clothes.
With the
slurping sound and your eloquent dance with rasam , we become a sight of awe to
the beings sitting opposite.
Congratulations!
you successfully finished the rasam.You have conquered the boss level of
traditional south Indian dining.
If you
still have your energy and respect indulge
in another round of rice with curd &
tangy pickle or see the light at the end of the leaf, we’re in for a treat to
our taste buds .
Though
you’ve come to the end of the leaf and your appetite, a small cup of payasam
is the icing on the cake which we will always crave for another round. After the battle and the drama on the leaf, when you
look up to face your embarrassment in front of others, we shall be greeted with
nobody but ourselves finishing up last while those 250 people sitting next to us rushing towards ice cream and gulab jamoon counter,
which we might think to leave for the
next wedding we attend together.
You
can now fold your banana leaf inward to signal your absolute victory, and walk
away with your pride & pristine clothes intact.
